You want to lose weight and “get healthy” but do you understand the importance of knowing your “why” for wanting those things? I know it seems like an obvious question but it’s one you need to be able to answer with great clarity and insight. Because knowing your why is what will help sustain you through all the hard work ahead.
If you’re just starting out on your health journey then I want to forewarn you that it’s going to be a loooong one! And what I hear from so many people, especially with weight loss as a goal, is that they want it to happen fast. I’m sure for most of you the weight came on slowly, so that’s exactly how it will leave…slowly.
Even if your focus isn’t all on losing weight, health doesn’t change overnight either. And the best way that I’ve found to make healthy changes is one small step at a time so you don’t get overwhelmed. That means you need patience and persistence for the long haul. But it also means finding some real motivation to get you through that long process.
Knowing your “why” means having a really good reason for pursuing that goal. And in this case, that means something other than just “looking good”. It’s like identifying a higher power outside of yourself to focus on. Without a good reason, you’ll have a hard time sticking with any new habits. But figuring this out will take some more thinking on your part, so let’s get started.
What really motivates us?
If adopting a healthy lifestyle was so easy then everyone would already be healthy. Unfortunately, about 73% of Americans are now overweight or obese and that’s not exactly living healthy! Statistically, that excess weight leads to a host of chronic disease states that are not just uncomfortable but also life-threatening.
Finding your why is all about identifying the right kind of motivation so you can keep up your new healthy habits. And there are two different kinds of motivation to focus on.
Related article: How to set a realistic fitness goal for this year.
Extrinsic motivation
Losing weight in order to look better is known as extrinsic motivation because it comes from something outside of us, or an external reward. It’s not a bad reason to want to lose weight because it can give you a quick boost of motivation in the beginning. The problem is that it generally doesn’t last.
Other examples of extrinsic motivation are losing weight to attract a mate, to win a contest, or avoid some consequence. Unfortunately, extrinsic motivation only lasts until we reach our goal. And sometimes not even that long! Then we often quit practicing those healthy habits and the weight comes right back.
Instead, you need to find some intrinsic motivation in order to maintain your habits for good. This might take a little longer to figure out because it’s not as obvious.
Intrinsic motivation
Teachthought.com states that intrinsic motivation is “the doing of an activity for its inherent satisfaction rather than some separable consequence” or reward. In other words, we do it because we enjoy it and it makes us feel good.
I know it seems crazy to some people that you could actually enjoy exercise or eating healthy but you can reach that point over time! Finding intrinsic motivation is hard but knowing your “why” will help you get there quicker.
Discover your real “why”
To find your “why”, or your reason for wanting to achieve your goal, you first need to answer the question “Why is that goal important to me?” Your answer might be “to avoid disease”. And this is a great answer, but it’s still extrinsic because it’s about a future consequence.
So the next question you need to answer is “Why does it matter to avoid disease?” Because a lot of people are living with diseases and they’re doing ok. You can take a pill, get a shot, or have surgery and manage a disease for many years. It might be an inconvenience but life will still be fine.
If that’s not good enough for you (and I hope it isn’t), then dig a little deeper into why you want to avoid disease. Maybe it’s because you want to feel good and have the energy to get out of the house to do things with others. So the next question is “Why does feeling good and having energy matter to you?”
This is the pattern I want you to follow. Ask yourself the questions I just asked. Then ask yourself “why does that matter?” for each response you give until you can’t dig any deeper. And that will get you to the core of your “why”. If you want a better understanding of this questioning concept watch this video with Dean Graziosi.
What it comes down to for me is having independence and the freedom to choose how I live my life. As long as I maintain my health and strength I have control over my life. That’s what really motivates me. I want my life to be my own.
Quality of life
Isn’t that what we all want in life? It’s why we save money to retire so we can finally enjoy doing what we want when we want. But who wants retirement to revolve around doctor’s appointments, taking all of your pills at the right time, and managing pain or symptoms?
My “why” is about having the strength and energy to be able to explore the world. I want to be out experiencing things rather than sitting at home flipping channels. My goal is to have a good quality of life both now and in the future. And that’s what really keeps me on track with my good habits.
The healthy choices you make now will keep you independent and free for many more years. That’s your higher purpose for maintaining healthy habits. And that can eventually lead to intrinsic motivation because you’ll look for ways to make healthy living enjoyable.
How to get intrinsically motivated
Knowing your “why” for your health goal will make you more likely to stick with the habits you need to get you there. And the easiest way to maintain those habits is to figure out how to enjoy the process of reaching your goal. I wrote an article on “How to enjoy exercise” because we all know we won’t do things we don’t enjoy.
In his book “Atomic Habits”, James Clear smartly advises us to learn to “fall in love with the process” of reaching a goal rather than the final result. The goal just points us in the right direction. But if we like what we’re doing we’ll want to keep it up so we not only reach that goal but change our lifestyle for good.
I can’t say enough about how important it is to find ways to enjoy exercise and healthy eating. In the beginning, it’s hard to imagine enjoying these things because they’re foreign to you. But if you keep trying you’ll figure out what works and what doesn’t. Then you get into a new rhythm that feels natural.
Find ways to enjoy healthy habits
Years ago I realized that I didn’t like treadmills or stationary bikes. But I’ve always loved walking and biking outside. And there’s the difference! I enjoy the outdoors and the scenery. I need my mind to be engaged while I’m exercising. So don’t go out and buy a treadmill because you think you’ll like it. It may end up being another clothes hanger!
Instead, ask a friend to use their machine or try one out in a hotel fitness room while you’re traveling. This is a great way to test-drive something new before buying. You might even want to get a gym membership so you can use different machines every time you go. Variety is one of the great benefits of a gym.
The other way to start to enjoy exercise is to listen to great music or watch a tv show while you work out. I do these things but I also listen to podcasts or interviews while I’m on my elliptical. It takes my mind off the work I’m doing. Keep experimenting until you find what works best for you.
Just don’t do exercise you hate thinking you’ll eventually like it! You may not love it to begin with but you can learn to like it over time. Part of that process is finding the right fit for your personality. My husband hated exercising at home the way I do, but then I toured some gyms and found the perfect one for him. He now works out as much as I do and even instructs classes!
My final thoughts
The importance of knowing your “why” is that it helps you stay motivated when things get hard. Your “why” should always be at the forefront of your mind. And finding intrinsic motivation will make things easier in the long run because you’ll be doing things you enjoy. These are two key factors in reaching any goal.
Health goals are especially difficult to achieve because you have to do things differently from most of your friends and family. You’ll need constant reminders of why you’re doing what you’re doing. It’s also helpful to keep educating yourself on how those habits impact your body and mind. That’s why I read so much and write this blog!
So keep trying new things until you find what works best for you. Then look around at the people in your life and see how things are going for them. Try to emulate the ones that feel good and have energy for all the activities they like. What are they doing that you could learn from?
I know I won’t be following the habits of the people living on pills and sitting in their recliners all day. I plan to be the 80-year-old woman teaching exercise classes and still doing all the things I love!
Related article: The woman I want to be